Yeah,… I still got it!
I may by almost 38. I may be married. I may be curvy,.. more curvy than I would like in some places. I may be a mom of 4. But apparently, the Domestic Goddess still has a little something something going on! I got my hair cut, REALLY cut yesterday afternoon. I went to the grocery store on the way home and was cashed out by Donovan’s date for the prom this weekend. We were chatting about my hair and her dress and I gathered my groceries and started to leave. I stopped to grab my keys out of my purse and as I did I heard the guy who had bagged my groceries ask Kim (the cashier) who I was. He knows Donovan, too, so she told him I was his mom. His comment, and I quote, “SHE is a mom? With a kid as old as Donovan? Are you sure? She is HOT! My mom sure doesn’t look like that!” Now, before you get images of me wearing bustiers and mini skirts,… BANISH THE THOUGHT! I was wearing jeans, flip flops, and a pink ¾-sleeve loose top. Nothing sexy AT ALL. Kim sent me a message later on MySpace, thinking I hadn’t heard all this and she told me that the trendy hair cut and the piercings were what did it for him. I don’t care,… it was the nicest thing I had heard in awhile!

My little boy is growing up!
Today is kindergarten registration for Ty. I am so not ready for the fact that he is old enough to start school! He is my little guy! How is it possible?! So, with shot records, Social Security card and birth certificate in hand, it is off to registration we go this morning. Because he will be 4 for the first few weeks of school, he is eligible to join the Young Fives program. It is in addition to kindergarten so it effectively adds a year of school, but is designed to help kids who might be a little young to start kindergarten. It is supposed to help with basic skills and socialization. The part that irritates me is that that the program person is really pushing it hard at me, for reasons I don’t agree with. I think the program is a great idea for the kids who need it. It isn’t a program for slow kids or anything like that. It is simply to help kids who are just young enough to be truly ready for kindergarten, despite the fact they are eligible to go. But Ty doesn’t have those issues. He is very socialized and he has been recognizing and writing most of his letters for a while. His only issue is speech, which is a physical issue, not a developmental one. The program isn’t designed for special needs, although speech therapy would be provided to him. But that same speech therapy would be given to him in kindergarten to, so it doesn’t seem like a good reason to hold him back. His socialization skills are fine and he already has more linguistic knowledge than is expected of an incoming kindergartener. It just seems to me that I would be holding him back for no real reason. I don’t like the apparent attitude that having a physical issue means that you have developmental ones, too.

Old friends,…!
I happened across an old Army friend, Barbara, on MySpace a couple days ago. We were in the same Vietnamese class at DLI, about 13 years ago. We were good friends back then, but lost contact in the years since. So I sent her a message and got a long one back from her this morning! It was so nice to “see” her again and chat about days gone by. She and I and another girl named Patrice all had birthdays within 10 days of eachother, all the same age. The two of them,a s well as our class, have made Cinco de Mayo never be the same again. On that night, pretty much our whole class went to El Torito’s and had dinner. After, we all ended up in the cantina and, let’s just say,… we had a good time. She was pounding tequila and started speaking Vietnamese to anyone and everyone. Other people thought she was nice. She and Patrice had to have my then boyfriend Evan help them up the stairs to the bathroom several times. At one point, the three of us decided to share a triple shot of Captain Morgan’s,… this after a lot of tequila and margaritas. Barb took the first third, passed it to me for my third, and then Patrice finished it. Within moments, Patrice barfed under the table,… ewww! The next day, we were all a little worse for wear. We had left Barb’s truck in the lot downtown, but had convinced her that she had sold it for $1. And the bushes along the side of the class building? Well, the ground seemed to be shades of pink,… the same color of the margaritas! It was an interesting evening, one memories and legends are made of!

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Being a Domestic Goddess,…!
Yesterday, there was a financial segment on The Today Show about finances and couples. They were discussing different kids of financial problems that couples run into and the easy solutions to them. One of the problems was spending on the sly. They were talking about couples making purchases without telling their spouses and how these purchases can add up. Their solution was to budget in an amount for each spouse that is theirs to spend without recrimination. This led to a discussion of stay at home parents and their value in the financial status of the household. The problem is that those stay at home parents don’t get compensated for their work and the spouse working outside the home doesn’t always give the stay at home parent equal financial rights. Their suggestion was that those couples should sit down and figure out the monetary equivalent for what the stay at home parent does. The idea is that it will give the working outside the home parent a new perspective for what the stay at home parent really does in financial terms. I did this a long time ago with Corey, and frequently remind him of it! I found a little “mom salary” wizard HERE that calulates the national average for what a stay at home parent “earns”. You can also localize it by adding in your zip code. It can be further personalized with a itemized listing of jobs and the hours you spend each week doing them. It calculates the whole thing and gives you both a normal salary and one with overtime! According to the calculator, I “make” a regular hourly rate of about $27.31, “earning” about $56,812 a year before overtime. With overtime, I “make” about $40.97 an hour hour, with an additional $59,652 in “earnings”. Altogether, I “earn” about $116,464. And yet, I don’t seem to see that reflected in my bank statement!

A lot of times, people look at a parent staying home as a loss of income, when in most cases, I think it is actually the opposite. For example, a stay at home parent,…

• Saves on child care costs. In my area, the average child care cost for a 1-2yo is about $165 a week for full time care. For a 3-4yo, the cost is about $160. My figures below are figured on full time day care (10 hours per day/5 days a week) for 48 weeks.
  

  Child	$ per week	$ per year	years
  Ty	$165	$7,920	2
  	$160	$7,680	3
  TY’S TOTAL SAVED:			$38,880
  Scott	$160	$7,680	3
  SCOTT’s TOTAL SAVED:			$23,040
  GRAND TOTAL SAVED:			$61,920

• Saves on taxes. The amount of money that we paid into taxes DRASTICALLY reduced, plus now that I stay at home, we qualify for several things at tax time.
• Saves on work-related food expenses. When I worked, most days I had to eat lunchout. At about $8 to $10 a meal, that is a savings of $40 to $50 a week, a total of between $1,920 and $2,400 over 48 weeks. I also generally stopped for coffee and a muffin each morning, another $5 a day, $25 a week, $1,200 over 48 weeks. That is a total of between $3,120 and $3,600 saved on work-related food expenses each year.
• Saves on grocery expenses. We generally eat out or eat take out far less often now that I am home. I have more time to cook and to grocery shop so I tend to save more money because I am not buying food for convenience rather than cost anymore. I save about $75 a week, $3,900 a year.
• Saves on gas prices. Because I generally drive only around town for short distances, I save a lot of money in gas prices, ESPECIALLY considering the current prices.
• Saves on hidden work expenses. When I still worked, we were always being asked to donate for one thing or another, from birthday cards to gifts and events. Those were small donations, but they add up. I averaged about $15 a month for those things, a total of $720 over 48 weeks. Plus there were the costs of clothing items necessary for the work. I was in the Army so my clothing expenses were less than that of most civilians, but I still had dry cleaning costs and the occasional uniform purchase. I averaged about $300 more a year in clothing costs for work than I do now. That brings me to about $1,020 saved over a year in hidden work expenses.
• Saves on entertainment. This one is a little odd, but I have found it to be true. Now that I am home, I find that I have the “need” to go and do things that cost money a lot less. Before, because I had so little free time, there was always this need to go and do things as a family, to jam in as much fun as possible. Because things are so much more relaxed now, I have more time for my family and don’t feel the need to go to the movies and spend $35 a pop for the whole family or spending money at the mall as often. Because I have the time and the opportunity, I have found all kinds of opportunities and activities for the kids, from rec center programs to story time at the library.

The Man Blanket
I finally finished the blanket and forced Donovan to pose with it for me! I had it all laid out last night before bed, blocking it into a nice shape. You can see by the picture that it definately doesn’t look blocked. That is because my feline companions thought it would be fun to roll about on it and leave it in a crumpled heap. I promise,… it looks better in person! There is a pic HERE and a close up HERE.

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Ty got shot!
I had to take him to the shot clinic yesterday for some shots, and he thoroughly did NOT appreciate the gesture. Usually, he barely even stirs, but 2 of the 3 given used larger needles and he was not at all happy about it. Poor baby! I felt bad for him, and I am useless at best during shots. I can hold him and hug and kiss him while he gets them and I do, but I can’t watch or I will be on the floor, requiring smelling salts! But no more shots for awhile and that should make up for it!

Running like the wind,…!
Donovan had a home meet last night so the boys and I went to cheer him on. It was nice and warm when we left the house to go over to the track, but once we got there, the wind kicked in. It was ridiculous, strong enough that it threw off running times by as much as 10-15 seconds or more. I finally got Donovan’s uniform jacket and wrapped Ty in it so he wouldn’t freeze!! I was impressed with how much faster he has gotten over the last year. I spent years running in the Army, both in PT and for marathons, so I gave him some tips about lengthening his stride and holding his hands a little differently and he seems to have picked that up really well. He is fairly short, but his stride is longer than even most of the bigger kids with longer legs. He ran a 4×2 relay and the 1-mile and the 2-mile and did really well at both. Of course, the kid runs year round so he never falls out of shape. He is a fairly small-framed kid so you don’t really realize just how in shape he is until you see him in shorts and a T-shirt, especially a tank like his uniform shirt. The kid is ripped under that! He has some huge biceps and a washboard stomach and pretty muscular legs and it cracks me up as a mom to sit in the stands and watch the girls watch him. The track girls worked at the guys meet and I kept seeing them touching his arm and his biceps. The little stud puppy!!

Blanket Blues!
I finally finished joining the squares of The Man Blanket, something I absolutely HATE doing. It calls for a single row of dc as a border, but I am going to do three with all three colors in the blanket. I should have blocked it, and if it were destined to go anywhere other than my house, I would have, but I was basically lazy. I can probably do it once it is finished and it will be fine.

Some people,…
There are times when I wonder about people. Dr. Phil loves to say that you get treated how you allow others treat you. But that isn’t always true. There are a couple of people in my life that just don’t hear what you are telling them. I have comfort in the fact that I am not the only one they do this to, but it isn’t enough! I have talked to them until I am blue in the face and they do nothing about it. What I say, and what others say to them, just doesn’t register with them and it is dismissed out of hand. I have confronted them about how they treat me and approached in a thousand different ways and it still does no good. I am pretty laid back when it comes to relating to other people. I am very casual and don’t stand on formality. But I guess I was brought up to believe in certain standards of behavior and common courtesy. And it seems that these people lack that. Conversations are always about what they want or what is going on with them, never anything outside of themselves. These same people will take advantage of any situation to push their agenda and there are times when that is just inappropriate. As my faithful friends and readers know, my grandma recently passed away. One of these people has used this as a guilt trip to push their own wishes in the most rude and heartless way possible and it hurts. The other person didn’t even acknowledge it with a simle “I’m sorry” before demanding (not asking for) assistance. What I got instead of condolences was a nasty note about not getting to my email before then. I guess I feel that there are some things that should be sacrosanct and the passing of a loved one should be one of them. Not something to be used as a tool to further own’s own agenda. Not to be ignored or lessened in importance.

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Mother’s Day Wrapup
It was definately a day of mixed emotions. I got up and Scott was already awake and watching TV in the playroom. He rushed me with hugs and kisses, Mother’s Day wishes and a gift. The first grade kids each had to tell the teacher about their favorite meal and how their mom made it. She typed it up and made it into a recipe book for each mom, containing “recipes” from all the kids. It was so cute! Ka’lani and Donovan? They didn’t even remember to say anything until after they heard Scott say something. Neither one of them made an effort with hugs or kisses or a card, nothing. Donovan claims that he made me one, but I have yet to see it. I told them not to eat breakfast, that I was going to take them out for it, so what did they do? Ate breakfast. Of course. So we went out for lunch. I don’t want much, but I guess I hoped that I would get some kind of love and recognition, especially with the fact that this has been an issue lately. It just doesn’t mean as much when it comes AFTER it has been pointed out to them. And yesterday was hard on me; I could have used the love. Saturday was the one month mark for my Grandma Ethel’s passing and yesterday was the first Mother’s Day without her, a day that always revolved around her as the matriarch of the family. I spent a good portion of the day in tears or close to it. I try to avoid that around the kids but there are times when I just can’t control it.

The Man Blanket, and other crafty endeavors, too!
I finished the last square for The Man Blanket (a pattern by Lion Brand called Circles to Squares) last night. I used a smaller hook than the J-hook called for so my squares are a little smalled, but it will still be good-sized. There are 3 large squares, 5 medium, and 16 smaller ones. I am now in the process of joining them and then I edge it and it is DONE! YAY!!

I also made a little pouch bag from a pattern called That Pouch Thing. It was incredibly easy to do and is a great way to use up scrap yarn. The pattern is easily adaptable to make it larger and there are infinite ways to be creative with it. I have a pic of it HERE and a closeup HERE of the bottom of it.

Just a month ago,…
It has been a month today since my grandmother passed away and I miss her so much. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t miss her or cry. But she is with my grandfather now and that is what they both wanted. But I miss them both so much.

Sick Scott!
A couple of hours after Scott went to bed, I heard his door open and, the next thing I know, there he is covered in barf! So, a bed was made for Scott on the floor of the living room and Mama camped out on the couch with him. This is another way of saying that Mama got just about zero sleep! The poor kid was up on and off all night long. I have no idea where it came from, either. He was fine before he went to bed, no problems at all. We had ordered in Chinese, but no one else got sick, so I have got not a clue!

Strike Two!
Donovan has a track meet today at South Jefferson and generally the rule is that if you miss the last practice prior to the meet, you don’t run the meet. He missed last night’s practice through no fault of his own so because his AP European History final was yesterday afternoon and didn’t end until after practice. So he was supposed to be at the school by 0830 to catch the bus to South Jeff. We only live about 5 minutes from the school by car so I got him up at 0740 to shower and I jumped in when he was done. I was still in the shower when he came knocking at the door. Apparently, they changed the time to meet at practice and nobody bothered to tell him or the other few that were taking the test and they were supposed to be there and on the bus AT THAT MOMENT!! YIKES! I was out of that shower, and in my clothes and out the door in warp speed. My poor teeth didn’t even get brushed before I was out the door. I ran out with my hair brush in hand, still combing out tangles! All I can say is thank goodness for hair bands and baseball hats!! And as I was driving? I discovered that one boob was half out of the cup,… not comfy!

Strike Three!
Because of the change in time, I didn’t get a chance to stop at the ATM to grab $20 for Donovan for food today. So, being the trusting Mom that I am, I told him to take my ATM card out of my purse and to take it with him. Since they usually stop at gas station/convenience stores with ATMs, I figured that would work. Well, post dropping him off, I had to stop at the grocery store and as I went in to my purse for my credit card, I discovered that the bonehead had taken the wrong card and now had my credit card. AARRGGHH!! Great start to the weekend!

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